Once upon a time, the gods were chilling in from the heavens when one of them suddenly realized, “Hey, you know what? Humans’ lives are going to suck sometimes. They’re going to have to deal with jobs and money and taxes and Nickelback. We should give them something to make up for all of that.” The other gods nodded and they all came to an accord.
And that’s the story of why we have peanut butter.